“Don’t Worry Sir; My Boyfriend is Like my Trampoline.”

One of the disadvantages of a large family:

little kids are exposed to pop culture

via their older siblings.

a.aaa-Funny-baby-errorIt was Christmas Eve  but we were stuck in Canadian Tire, waiting  at the auto parts desk, not to buy a present, but to buy a car part Michael needed to fix our vehicle.

Lucy, three weeks before turning two, was sitting  quietly in the shopping cart looking adorable in a  soft, pink snowsuit.  Suddenly she pointed and yelled ,

“Gee mum, that guy is cute!”

Once again my tiny toddler startled and amused me  because her  perfectly articulated words were so incongruent with  her  appearance and  the baby like tone of her voice. I turned around to catch a glimpse of the gentleman who had caught Lucy’s attention and I almost burst into gales of laughter. He was  a thirty year old, skinny, balding, gap-toothed banker type sporting a blond, handlebar moustache, wearing a dark suit and beige trench coat. Everyone within hearing distance glanced in our direction. This young man blushed with  embarrassment  but also with pleasure. With a huge smile, he replied,

“That is the nicest thing anyone has said to me in a long time!”

We all laughed but I thought,

“Where on earth did that sort of idea come from?”

Then it all came together.

One of the after dinner responsibilities, at that stage in our family’s life, was entertaining Lucy so I would be free to act as the ring master to the circus of activity that swirled around our house in the early evening.  Mara and Melissa jumped at the chance to be with Lucy because they would relax, look at catalogues and magazines.  I knew that they pointed out objects and people to Lucy to increase her vocabulary  but  I realized one of their comments must have been,

“THAT guy is cute!”

This incident reveals  one of the disadvantages of a large family; little kids are exposed to pop culture via  their older siblings.

A prime demonstration of this phenomena was during ’circle time’ in kindergarten. Sometimes the teacher encouraged the children to sing a song, expecting to hear something like “Twinkle, twinkle little star”. She did not get that sort of song from my youngest two.this teacher laughed with amusement as she told me what my two youngest children sang for the other five-year olds.

Anthony sang “Go Grease Lightning” from the movie musical “Grease”.

Lucy sang some pop song about not dating a scruffy looking guy “who sits in the passenger side of his best friend’s car”!

However, there is usually a positive side to everything . My oldest daughters also taught the younger ones a valuable life lesson through the lyrics to this song,

“Don’t settle for the first boy who gives you attention.”

The lesson must have been absorbed because all my girls are very selective when it comes to boyfriends. In high school, if my daughters date, it only lasts a couple of weeks because they find that the boys are typically  “idiots”. Lucy’s English teacher was just teasing her, last month, that she was high maintenance and he pitied her boyfriend. Lucy shot back,

“Don’t worry sir; my boyfriend is like my trampoline.”

Her teacher was puzzled, so Lucy explained,

“I don’t have one!” `

About melanie jean juneau

Melanie Jean Juneau serves as the Editor in Chief of Catholic Stand. She is a mother of nine children who has edited her kid's university term papers for over a decade. She blogs at joy of nine9 and mother of nine9. Her writing is humorous and heart warming; thoughtful and thought-provoking. Part of her call and her witness is to write the truth about children, family, marriage and the sacredness of life. Melanie is the administrator of ACWB, a columnist at CatholicLane, CatholicStand, Catholic365 , CAPC, author of Echoes of the Divine and Oopsy Daisy, and coauthor of Love Rebel: Reclaiming Motherhood.

18 comments on ““Don’t Worry Sir; My Boyfriend is Like my Trampoline.”

  1. Out of the mouths of babes, lol. I loved you’re daughter’s comeback. Great piece 🙂

  2. Funny story, love the picture.

      • I forgot to tell you my story!

        My in-laws are hicks. We live on a farm. So, the boys pee outside. No big deal.

        Several months ago, my brother-in-law was about in town. Well, Justice, his son, who was about 3 at the time, said he needed to pee. They had stopped somewhere to eat. They got out of the car. He started digging for something he needed out of his car. When he turned around, Justice had his pants at his ankles. An old lady was staring at them as she walked by.

    • love your story..how about making it a little bit longer?

      • Probably would, but I realized I knew about 0 of the details. I wasn’t there, just heard it from my wife.
        My son is clever. He is 3 and loves to tell stories. Sometimes I’ll ask him to just tell me a story. He will ramble on about bears chasing him and his brother, and he has fast shoes, so he can get away. But Ethan falls, so he goes back to help him. Really amazing stuff comes out of his head.

        Just the other day I was writing a new setting of a gnomish village. I read a nightly story to my kids and it was, of course, that time again. I didn’t particularly want to change gears from writing a gnomish village to reading about Pug the Magician. So, I cheated. I started telling him about this village. Badgers and wolverines tilling the soil.

        “And dogs.”

        No, no dogs. I guess they could have dogs, but they live in a hidden city. It is peaceful and quiet. Dogs would make too much noise. They might chase the badgers.

        “Oh… They don’t like dogs.”

        Well, they do, but not to live with them. They love all animals. Maybe they tamed dogs for men, so that they could be man’s best friend.

        So, I mentioned some gnome kids.

        “The kids need a playground.”

        Maybe they do need a playground… But these kids are playing a trick on someone. They carved symbols on stones and threw them into a building site. When the builder’s found it, they gave it to Mauven, the historian. I didn’t think he would understand what a historian was, so I asked him what he thought it was.

        “Someone who reads books.”

        It seemed to vocalize my exact thoughts of that character. Where does he learn this stuff?
        Yes, he reads books. So, he read lots of books trying to figure out what the stones were. But, they were really fake. The kids said, if you lined them up right, they said, “Mauven the Chicken”.

        He thought that was funny.

        I never would have thought that it would have been so useful to throw pieces of my story up to my three year old. When I left him tucked away in his bed, I was ready to write some more.

      • Wonderful process.. just talk and listen to that kid and your book will be rematable. I have 9 kids they came out with remarkable insights..they are deep; they just don’t inerit your eye colour but many of your talenyts and gifts. In addtion they are intuitive and connected to a store house of images and impressions, perhaps Jung’s idea of a collective body of shared symbols etc is real. I am a Christian, and for me they spoke into my spirit, bits of wisdeom that they could sense more clearly than me

      • We do seem to lose a lot between our transition from a child to adult. They continue to surprise me all the time.

        I’m going to have to go post this up on my blog. I liked telling that story.

      • I will stop by.,,, it is delightful

  3. That was hilarious and I love the comeback. Rather surprised a teacher would tease a girl like that.

    • she had this particular teacher for two years; he respected her intelligence and i think she is the only one he would have spoken to like that. HE is head of the Engish depatment, a philosophy, theology major and brilliant. As the youngest of nine kids, Lucy is witty and self-possessed

  4. Too funny! I didn’t have one during times when my sisters had many. But I do recall her music. It was during the late sixties and early seventies and I started getting exposed to psychedelic rock…Donny Osmond, David Cassidy, Bobby Sherman and Michael Jackson got blown away into the wind, as Steppenwolf, Iron Butterfly and others took their place.

  5. Good article and I really enjoyed reading it!
    It’s kinda cool to watch what the “new” is going to be to replace the old stuff….and if classics like Twinkle, twinkle little star will be replaced!

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