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Viagra: Consumer Reports

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There is some doubt to the claims and/or validity of Viagra being a wonder drug for men suffering from Penile Erectile Dysfunction, or for women who’s partner SUFFERS from P.E D.

THIS reporter will allow that there is a physical reaction from ingestion of said “Little blue pill”.

But, I don’t think it works on me like it does on others. 

For instance, all the blood rushes to my face and ears.

My blood pressure goes up, not down.

My vision blurs as if I’m developing cataracts.

Mr. Happy is no longer Happy. He goes down…not up.

How can I do the dirty deed if I can’t breathe or see?

Maybe at 16, a flushed countenance and labored breathing was the norm before the Rut, but at 49…? It’s a trip to the ER.

There was absolutely no stirring of any type in Happy Valley.

Probably due to the fact that when the BP is hovering near borderline stroke occurrence, the Renal system seems to shut down.

I couldn’t have peed if you pulled it with a tow rope.

When I went to the ER and told the nurse I was suffering from an erection lasting 4 hrs, she smiled politely and asked me for my address 6 times, my phone number 14 times and entered my address into a GPS.

SHE said just in case I might need an ambulance someday.

Looking at her glazing eyes, puffy lips and deep breathing,  I put my hands in my lap and thanked her.

You should have seen the ER doctors expression when he asked me what was wrong and I told him. He looked down at Happy Valley then back up to me. He said “Uh…you don’t LOOK like you have an erection sir….”

I looked at him, and told him that the erection was in my face and ears.

Final Summation: That is definitive proof to all women out there, that evidently I am controlled by the big head.

Oh….to be 16 again…

When a knot hole in a tree, full of honeybees wouldn’t have stopped me!

C’est la vie!

About treyzguy

I am so full of self-confidence and crap that I would worship myself against my own will.... Under penalty of death.

One comment on “Viagra: Consumer Reports

  1. I think I missed something yesterday. Was it your birthday? If so, Happy b-day. Think of it this way, you share the same b-day as Hugh Jackman. Now maybe that doesn’t do anything for you, but think of it as a potential pick-up line. LOL

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