It is quiet now…
There are no sounds other than mine
I can’t hear any wind outside or in…
Sometimes I forget to breathe when I listen
Gone are the sounds a younger man lived through
Of his kids
Of his wife
Gone are the sounds that they made when I was a big part of their life
Gone are the sounds of the children I knew when they would fight over dad
A knee for each was the best way to settle this great dispute, or a candy bribe
How about a freeze pop, just give dad a few minutes….
Then… We can play….
The sound of minutes passing then, slid by unheard…
The children are quiet as they wait for dad to act like a kid.
But now the sound of time passing is a background toll that thrums through each second of silence
So still, so quiet
How much is it worth now…?
Those minutes that I let slide by?
How much would I give to have any given second back?
ANYTHING…. Everything says I…
I never noticed that a child’s smile or giggle is faster than light, and twice as bright
How many smiles can pass in a second then? Before they had to stop… And wait on dad?
I played at being grown up. I played at being their dad.
I didn’t know what I was doing…
But I never knew that time is real
I never knew that when a moment passed, I lost claim to it.
If I had only known the worth of time…
If I had only known my own worth in my child’s eyes.
If only I had known that I was the greatest thing in their lives…
Other than mom… 😉
My children spent every minute trying to get me to “Look dad… Watch me!”
They spent their childhood trying to get my attention…
Now I’m spending the rest of mine trying to get them to hear me cry “Look at me…!”
If I had only known then, what I know now.
Maybe it wouldn’t be so quiet…